A rut becomes a rut because it was working at one point. We only think of it as a rut when it stops working, or we sense it could be better. When a habit is working well for us we tell ourselves we are disciplined. When a habit is not working for us we tell ourselves we need more willpower to break it. Either way our brain is doing the same work to keep us in that habit.
Think about it this way. You are out hiking in your favorite place. Most often, we follow a trail that’s been carved out for us, a path well-traveled by fellow hikers. That trail was usually created to find the best path to the destination and help people not get lost. It is generally enjoyable and we feel safer when we follow it than wandering off into the woods. It is easier to stay on the trail and it works for us. However, if you are like me, sometimes you just want to do a little exploring because you sense there is something even better to find off the trail.
If you are itching to get off the beaten path in some aspect of your life here are some strategies to consider, depending on your situation.
- Your path isn’t working – Sometimes, the easiest rut to get out of is the one that we detest the most. Because, as Bob Dylan aptly put it, “When you ain’t got nothing, you got nothing to lose”. This is the situation in which your motivation to change is the greatest. You are willing to do more work and take more risk to change your path when your rut is making you unhappy. Generally, taking a leap and making any change in this situation is better than making no change. So, jump off the trail and don’t look back.
- You get thrown off the trail – Life’s unexpected turns – like job loss, loss of a relationship, or health issues – can abruptly derail us from our chosen path. It is natural to resist this change and cling to what is familiar. However, the sooner we can embrace the need for a new direction the sooner we will find stability. When you get thrown off your path, get up, look forward and embrace forging a new path.
- Your path is pretty good – This is the hardest change to make. Most people don’t make this change and don’t understand when someone does. Why would they? The trail is pretty good. However, you can see off in the distance and you have an urge to go explore a bit to see if you can find a better path. In this case there is a lot of risk. What if you are wrong? You gave up a perfectly good trail for nothing. In this situation, do some exploring but keep your current path in sight. When you are working up the courage to do some exploring remember this. The things we usually regret most in life are the things we do not try.
We’ve all encountered these scenarios in our lives. When faced with them again, reflect on past experiences: What worked well? What would you do differently? And above all, never stop exploring.